Warning: Watching this video while drinking any kind of beverage (I was drinking coffee) may cause you to do a spit take and choke. Drink responsibly laugh like the person in the next cubicle is getting fired and you’re the only one who knows it.
Got this one from The Accordian Guy
Here’s Bo Burnham singing his nerd-folk/filk song, New Math:
In case you were wondering what the lyrics were, here they are:
What’s a pirate minus the ship? Just a creative homeless guy
And an anteater plus a large hungry mutant ant? An ironic way to die
And what’s domain, domain, range (x, x, y) — a kid with too much in his pants
and two balls minus one, six titles at the tour de france.
Split a decision with long division,
Take the circumference of your circumcision
Live like your data and when you’re all ‘set’
Put it all together and whatever you get…
Is new math
What’s a bag of chips divided by five? That’s a Nike worker’s meal
And Santa Claus mutliplied by i? Well, I guess that makes him real
And the square root of the NBA is Africa in a box
How do you trace a scatter plot? Give the pencil to Michael J. Fox
Take the approximate moral proportion of the probable problem of a pro-life abortion
Live like your data, and when you’re all ‘set’
Put it all together and whatever you get…
Is new math
And if you made a factor tree of the factors that caused my girl to leave me you’d have a tree
…full of Asian porn.
C-A-L-C-U-LATOR (see you later) mathematical minds make industrial smog
and whats the opposite of ln(x): Duraflame, the unnatural log
Support the farmers with a pro-tractor
Link Kennedy and Lincoln with a common factor (fact, or)
Live like your data…blah blah
Word problems
If there’s a fat guy in a pastry shop with a twenty dollar bill and he’s ready to buy
In order to predict his volume change you need to know the value of pi (pie)
And theres a metal train that’s a mile long and at the very back end a lightning bolt struck her
How long ’til it reaches and kills the driver, provided that he’s a good conductor
And if ten percent of men are gay and twenty percent of men are Chinese
What are the odds that a man chosen at random spends his free time and mealtime while on his knees
And if Kim is half as old as Bobby who is two years older than twelve year old Tori
For how many more 30 day months will their threesomes be considered statutory rape
Cause havin’ sex is like quadratic expansion: if it can’t be split then it’s time to stop
and havin’ sex is like doing fractions, it’s improper for the larger one to be on top
And havin’ sex is like math homework, I do it best when I’m alone in my bed
And squarin numbers’ are just like women, if they’re under thirteen just do them in your head
And new math”