Can’t Go Back

Yesterday while bringing the Christmas decorations in from the garage I stumbled upon my leather bomber jacket I bought way back when I was in college.

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Worried

When I was a 12 back in the 1980s my biggest worry was about dying in a nuclear war. Now that I’m past 50 and diabetic my biggest worry is a Snickers bar.

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Lettered

My daughter received a letter for running Cross Country at her high school. It’s a D. I told her “if you’d tried harder you could have gotten an A”.

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First Surgery

My first surgery is done. I asked the doctor, “On a scale of 1 to 10 how hard was this surgery?”   “Oh, one. Very easy,” he said.   Good to know, I’m easy.

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I Want The Best

I need a new spouse. My wife doesn’t believe in putting the ketchup in the refrigerator even though it says right on the package, “For best results refrigerate after opening.” If I’m going to pay $5 for a bottle of ketchup then it better be the best damn ketchup I’ve ever had.

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Doing Well

After 3 months since my diagnosis and start on medications I can confirm I am doing much better. My weight is down 34lbs and steadily dropping. I’m walking/running for a steady hour a day now and I’ve completely removed processed sugar, high fructose corn syrup and caffeine from my diet. I haven’t been able to…

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